The mother of an acquaintance of mine passed away recently, and I attended the funeral just the other day. Some old friends were also there, and a few of us got together to chat after the ceremony.

The people in this group of friends are of the same generation—we met because our children were classmates and have known each other for about 30 years now. The conversation naturally starts with memories of the departed but gradually shifts to our own parents, who are of the same generation. Perhaps because we are all in our 60s, or because our fathers have passed on, the talk then flows to updates on our surviving mothers. We also find ourselves discussing the parents of acquaintances who weren’t present.

Once the discussion on our parents’ generation faded, the conversation shifted to ourselves. This brings me to my main theme today. There are certain changes that people in our age group—mostly in their 50s and 60s—commonly face. Those changes are when our children strike out on their own, and when we must deal with the end of our working careers.

Until recently, it seems that for the past three decades, themes related to our kids have been a common topic of our conversation. To put it bluntly, the children were indeed the tie that bound the members of our generational group. But as the kids entered the workforce, got married, or moved away, we found that conversations about them were gradually pushed aside.

As mothers are generally more involved in the lives of their children than fathers, their children’s independent is more likely to represent a significant change in their lives. They invariably ask themselves, “Where do I now direct the time and passion that I had channeled into child rearing?”

Then there is the issue of withdrawal—either full or partial—from the working world, a transition that often applies more to fathers. This phase often roughly coincides with their children beginning their own lives as adults. Then, as with the mothers, they will ask themselves, “Where do I now direct the time and passion that I had devoted to my work?”

Of course, in today’s world, where it has become common for both men and women to have full-time jobs, this transition may look somewhat different. And households comprising a single resident or a childless couple may not have to deal with this at all.

However, it can be said that most people in their 50s or 60s will face the challenge of rethinking how to allocate their time and energy once their children have left the nest or when their full-time careers come to an end. The impression I’ve gotten through conversations with my peers is that this topic demands closer attention in society. If this challenge is recognized and anticipated early on, it can lead people to richer, more fulfilling lives.

While financial planning for a prosperous life seems to be a popular topic of discussion, the question of where to direct one’s time and passion—equally important for living a rich and fulfilling life—is rarely broached in daily conversation. My sense is that society would be considerably brighter if we could anticipate this challenge and address it thoughtfully as our society continues to age.

Hirotaka Shimizu
Chairman and CEO
Kamakura Shinsho, Ltd.